Me looking at my biopsy in the microscope:
One-sentence summary: A less-than-gentle landing from a beach mini-holiday to DEFCON Level 1 medical attention; Mike blood tests return negative — to “probably” a false-negative — to an inviable (read: altogether just wrong and useless) test; admitting into a public hospital waiting in a “first-come, first-push” line to be seen by tropical disease specialists; suddenly immersed in Very Scary Spanish; a series of invasive tests and opinions; a clinic full of people on IV’s, covered in similar lesions, undergoing research testing for an international study; and finally a series of positive-positive results and a semi-prompt flight to the States.
Right Now: It was a rough week. Anything to get out of a regional meeting.
No one panic. I am fine.
I am not contagious, not in pain, no longer possibly dying from Mike, and at some point this week I hope to begin treatment.
And no, I do not know what the treatment is, how long, what it looks like, and every hour it changes. I am not allowed to leave DC, nor visitors, nor to have an independent thought without a government form.
So you’re going to have to be patient and wait too.
Hashtag, Jazz Hands.
Expression of the Week: Departamento de Enfermedades Infeccioasas Tropicales y Dermotolicas – if you can’t translate that on your own you don’t want to add it to your lexicon.
Week Thirty-Five. Each day felt like its very own month.
Last week’s blog I left off speculating if my new pet “Mike” (a chronically unhealed bug bite in my right forearm) was, in fact, a properly self-diagnosed botfly larvae or something from the Dark Ages.
Yeah… nope.
Mike is something much tinier and a lot more serious. Mike is a New World Order of said disease from the Dark Ages and -fun fact- he appears to be 98% Brazilian. Plus, it turns out “Mike” is really a million different microscopic Mikes.
And they are attacking my cells.
And they are winning.
Assholes.
I am still not publishing the diagnosis or pictures because I don’t trust any of you with Google. Just skip that part.
Trust me, I suffered enough for us all this week. Please enjoy the highlight reel.
My rare jungle disease friend comes from a tiny-neighbor version of a mosquito, in a very specific environment that does not exist in the States. If this said insect is 1) female, 2) infected with Mike, 3) pregnant on a Tuesday while Mercury is in Retrograde, and 4) feeds on you after a bridge collapse… well, you get a parting gift.
As you can see, a lot of logistical planning went into getting out of this regional meeting.
Mike takes months-to-years to multiply under your skin and eats you from the inside out and you eventually (after a very very very long time) die.
One RPCV asked me why I didn’t just get a yeast infection. Once again, I may have overdone it.
There are three levels to Mike: 1) That’s Kinda Shitty, 2) Oh That’s Really Shitty, and 3) Oh Girl, You Gonna Die Badly.
It was a long week of some ups and downs but Mike & I are at a very early Level One: That’s Just Maybe Kinda Shitty.
Remember. Nobody panic.
The rarity and severity of this particular critter has resulted in my medical evacuation from Peru to Washington D.C. due to Peace Corps Medical protocol. It can be treated in that one clinic in Peru, but it is a month of daily IV treatments in a clinical research study and the NIH wants me all to themselves.
Finally. It feels so nice to be wanted for my body again.
Vamos a ver.
Parting Shots
Mailing Address
Leaderboard: Four letters from Lander addresses arrived and wait for me in Oxapampa. Site mate B is working on getting the packages.
Sorry guys. It may be awhile. xo
Libélula en Perú 
Holding you in my heart, dear one.
Much love
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Thanks Judi. It’s quite a ride. Love to you and Joe.
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Oh shit, sorry! Your humor is indispensable; Mike is not. Get out Mike! Thank you for sharing your wild journey…big hugs at ya…
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Thanks D. I am glad you laughed. My humor is my best coping mechanism. Love you.
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would a walk in the snow help?
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A walk in the snow helps everything…and Mike can’t live where it’s cold, so Jess should come to Wrangell or Lander stat. (oops…forgot the part about not leaving DC).
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Mike has a cozy kwanza in my cell. Believe me, I wish I could. That’s why I didn’t want to post this week. xo
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For some strange reason the Center of Disease Control and PC Medical teams didn’t think I would get the best treatment in Wyoming for this particular rare tropical disease. But give me a week. I will convince them otherwise. (Working on it Willy. Believe me being this close is wrecking me. Will call when I know. xo)
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Oh my holy heckness! And here I was trying to video call you just to show you snow! Sending love and patience to you and a big middle finger (and a mob duo with gold chain necklaces in a stolen car) to Mike who can kiss my as*
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Love you and your coping humor.
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It would be really miserable and scary if I didn’t have it. Love you.
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I can come see you in DC when your ready for a visitor!! I’d love to see you. Sending you lots of kick as* to pack Mike up and send him on his way.
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Hi Lesta! I will let you know when I am cleared off the medical leash! xoxo
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Holy shamoly! Never a dull moment! So glad you’re getting the care you need to oust Mike but dang! Glad Miami welcomed you with flowers and love and hope. May abolishment of tropical scariness by swift and permanent! Thinking of you!!
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Hi Alyssa. Thanks for your note. It’s all going to make a great screenplay someday, right? Thanks for the light and love. xo
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Holy cow Jess! Will be thinking of you here in snowy Wyoming. I am actually now thinking of never leaving the state…or Lander….or my house….
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Wait. So zero interest in visiting me in Peru then? Jajajaja. Stay warm. Thanks for the note and your warm thoughts. xo
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Jess, NinJa! Well, another checked item for your I-Wasn’t-Freaking-Serious Bucket List (“rare tropical disease” sub-bucket). I hardly want to speak lightly about this; it’s better that you do. May I suggest this yogic Intention: “Joy in movement,” to whatever degree — this is a certified-yogi’s prescription. And Happy Valentine’s Day’s Boxing Day (whatever that is). Lots of love, dc & The Duck & Austen (nose twitches from her)
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Even your comments on my blog make me want to be a better writer. Love back to you DC, JR, and Austen. I am going to go take my yogi prescription out for a joyful walk. Love this intention. Love you all! -Ja
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Oh Jess! I’m so sorry. I’m glad you discovered this early and are getting the right treatment. I will be thinking of you and sending healing wishes!!! ❤️
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Oh Charlotte thanks so much for your note! I am super lucky and evidently charmed. I love you sending your thoughts and wishes. xo
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